Grandparents are often confused about mediation
Here is a definition of mediation for grandparents and how it can be helpful to them. Perhaps this will clarify things for you and help you understand it a little better.
Before I explain that to you, let me give you the definition of mediation. It is a process where two people who have common interests in a case sit down and try to solve their differences peacefully. The mediation for grandparents is very similar to this process, only with a twist.
Mediation for grandparents is not about finding common ground in their own lives or even sharing anything with their children. There is no “common ground.” It is more about coming together with an open mind to find some common ground where you can both come to a mutual agreement.
What happens in mediation for grandparents? You and your grandchildren sit together and talk with each other about your problems. You may share your thoughts and feelings, then they tell you how they feel about your situation.
As I said, there are many things that can bring the two of you together in mediation.
Of course, both of you have things in common as well as differences. You may find that you both have hurt feelings because you are not good at communicating. Or perhaps you both have a dislike for your spouse or children.
These things can all be brought to the table and discussed by the two of you together. Often times the healing power of the words of your grandchildren is enough to heal a lot of different wounds.
Another thing that you might want to consider is the idea of grandparents not being able to help much themselves. The truth is that grandparents do not have the financial resources to help their grandchildren out if they need it. However, mediation for grandparents can help you both out by sharing ideas and experiences that you both like.
You know you probably have things in common when it comes to your differences with your children, spouse, and your grandchildren. If you feel that you are not all that different, then you may want to think about including your grandchildren in your discussions. With them, you will be able to talk about your concerns and they can be there for you when you are having trouble communicating.
So what happens during mediation for grandparents?
When you two sit down to discuss your differences and your concerns, you will share information. That means sharing your stories and what you have felt, experienced, and one that has been difficult for you.
The important part about all of this is that it is not about taking sides. No one ever wants to feel like they are part of a “culture war.” This is not a place to do that.
You are going to talk about these things and learn to better understand what your grandchildren have gone through, and what you could have done better. By sharing information and talking, you can learn from each other and reach common ground. That can be healing.
Grandparent mediation does not have to be about one side having to win the conflict. It is a process where two people who are experiencing conflict sit down and talk together to create a way forward. It is not about fighting or winning, but about coming together to work out a resolution.
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