In Mediation Barnsley, the Five Stages of Grief

Why do mediations take such a long time, sometimes the entire day? There are occasions when the result appears to be very foreseeable. When a solution is found, an outside observer could look at the situation and think to themselves, “That was obviously going to be the answer from the beginning; what took them so long?” Those who have prior experience mediating disputes are aware that in order to reach a resolution, the parties involved need to do “the dance,” an expression that is occasionally used to refer to the Mediation Barnsley process. However, why?

Most of the time, our response is that individuals have a right to be heard. After being heard, individuals are able to make the transition from the emotional to the intellectual and begin to think about potential answers. This everything takes time. I believe that this is not the only thing that is occurring here. It’s possible that neither party will be able to go on with negotiations for a settlement until they go through what psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross referred to as the five stages of grieving.

Typically, when we think of these stages, we think of those who have suffered a bereavement or another significant sort of loss such as divorce or being made redundant.

So what exactly do we lose through Mediation Barnsley? It is coming to terms with the fact that the vindication or settlement to which a party feels he or she is entitled will not be realised in the course of the proceeding. The following is an example of each of the five stages:


One side just cannot fathom how the other may fail to see the validity of their position in the dispute. “In accordance with the recommendations made by my industry colleagues,…” “I have an exhaustive document trail that demonstrates that I am correct…,” the speaker said. “Why can’t they see what’s so blatantly clear to everyone else?”


When one side “just doesn’t understand it,” the other might swiftly cause a shift to rage as the dominant emotion. Dehumanisation kicks in. They don’t want to interact with the person on the other side because “you have no idea what kind of person he is. He is an abusive and dishonest person. I have no desire to interact with him. There is no need for it.”


We are not going to discuss the bargaining that is taking place between the parties here, but rather the bargaining that is taking on in the brain of the individual who is being considered. It consists of asking pointless “what if” questions. In the context of the loss, the question may be phrased as follows: “What if I hadn’t nagged him to go out shopping? If I hadn’t told him, he would have waited till later, and the accident would not have happened. In the context of the Mediation Barnsley, the question may be posed as follows: “Why did I instruct the attorneys to issue the claim and incur all of those costs?” “I should have listened to my wife when she told me to let it go, but I didn’t.”


The moment when things begin to calm down is easily recognisable to mediators. Even if the client’s wrath appears to have abated, they are in a terrible mood. I am very sorry, Gary. You have done all in your power, but unfortunately, I do not believe that we will be able to come to an agreement. At this point, we need to keep things going by being softly persistent and supporting one another. We also need to keep things moving forward. A settlement is getting closer, despite the fact that it might not appear like it at this particular point in time.


When the parties have accepted the fact that the settlement will not be what they had initially hoped for, it is common for one of them to declare, “I have an idea.” Are you willing to present this deal to the other party on my behalf? This is the stage in the Mediation Barnsley process where things will often begin to move in a more favourable manner. Mediation Barnsley, as opposed to a death in the family or being laid off from a job, is genuinely about making gains. These wins include settling the disagreement, ideally having an important need satisfied, saving time and money, experiencing less stress, and in some circumstances restoring a healthy relationship.

It is not necessary for the Kübler-Ross model to have a linear progression. Not everyone who suffers a loss will progress through all five stages of grief. It is possible that they will go through some of them or do so in a different sequence. In the context of Mediation Barnsley, we are discussing interactions between two or more parties, each of whom may be progressing through a variety of phases at their own unique rates. Because of this, it is possible for it to become even more difficult and time-consuming.

Why is it necessary to go through all of this?

It seems to explain why certain cases do not resolve on the day that they are heard. It is unlikely that a compromise will be reached between the two sides until they each reach a point of acceptability. Of course, this is not the case all the time. I have observed several instances in which a person has given their consent to the settlement under the impression that they truly don’t have any other options due to their feelings of rage or sadness. After the Mediation Barnsley, let’s keep our fingers crossed that they can eventually come to an agreement.

In the end, it might shed light on the reasons behind why things take such a long time. If we have this knowledge, it can enable us to be more patient during the Mediation Barnsley process, whether we are acting as a mediator, a lawyer, or even a party. If we persevere through the steps in the process with patience, we will typically succeed in the end.

Contact a Mediator in Barnsley today 03300 101 382